The Stimulated Nation of Caffeinated is a titanic, socially progressive nation, ruled by Random Joe with a fair hand, and remarkable for its rum-swilling pirates, smutty television, and unlimited-speed roads. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless population of 13.985 billion Caffeinatedians hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The relatively small, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The City That Never Sleeps. The average income tax rate is 10.3%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Caffeinatedian economy, worth a remarkable 6,069 trillion Cappuccino Coinzes a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Soda Sales, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is notable. Average income is an amazing 434,035 Cappuccino Coinzes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

It's considered providence that the political lexicon contains a syrup of company slogans, Caffeinatedian watches are often the only thing to survive a disaster intact, cyber-crime and tin-foil hat sales are both increasing at record rates, and Members of Parliament are often found living in cardboard boxes. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Caffeinated's national animal is the Walking Coffee Plant, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is None but drinking decaf is a sin.

Caffeinated is ranked 309,912^th in the world and 1,430^th in Europeia for Nicest Citizens, with 0.19 average smiles per day.