The Brachycardian Cavalry of Battle Cavemen is a mammoth, genial nation, ruled by Hank Strong with a fair hand, and notable for its free-roaming dinosaurs, absence of drug laws, and suspicion of poets. The hard-working, democratic population of 6.848 billion Battle Cavemen hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The tiny, liberal, outspoken government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Education, Spirituality, and Welfare are also considered important, while International Aid and Social Policy receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Brachycardian Caves. The average income tax rate is 7.5%.

The Battling economy, worth 487 trillion blue gemstones a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Pizza Delivery, and Woodchip Exports. Average income is 71,204 blue gemstones, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.3 times as much as the poorest.

Teenage male videogamers often suffer repetitive strain wrist injuries, discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation is illegal, a bill to outlaw math homework has been submitted, and cyber-crime and tin-foil hat sales are both increasing at record rates. Crime, especially youth-related, is a problem, probably because of the absence of a police force. Battle Cavemen's national animal is the black wolf and its national religion is Defender Moralism.

Battle Cavemen is ranked 80,323^rd in the world and 119^th in The Yamada Ryo Star Warriors for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring 2,890.15 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.