The Most Serene Kingdom of Arstotskiano is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by King Charles I with an iron fist, and remarkable for its public floggings, absence of drug laws, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 1.794 billion Arstotskianians are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Thossaliniki. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 65.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Arstotskianian economy, worth 380 trillion Arstotskoins a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Retail, Information Technology, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an amazing 212,157 Arstotskoins, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,726,681 per year while the poor average 5,699, a ratio of 302 to 1.

The Great Arstotskianian Desert is reputedly the most uninhabitable place in the region, scientists are researching the best way to kill off humanity to prevent catastrophic war, jaywalkers are condemned to lives of poverty for their heinous crimes, and school lessons are constantly interrupted by 'teacher needs a break' time. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Arstotskiano's national animal is the Eurasian Brown Bear, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Atheism.

Arstotskiano is ranked 27,407^th in the world and 68^th in Lands End for Smartest Citizens, with 51.72 quips per hour.