Largest Agricultural Sector: 1st Largest Trout Fishing Sector: 4th Most Ignorant Citizens: 50th
The Eternal Misfortune of
Corrupt Dictatorship
Stop reading my motto!
Civil Rights
Below Average
Political Freedom

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population5.429 billion


The Eternal Misfortune of Aqualagoon is a colossal, efficient nation, renowned for its deadly medical pandemics, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 5.429 billion Aqualagoonians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The tiny, corrupt, well-organized government is effectively ruled by the Department of Industry, with Welfare and Healthcare not funded at all. The average income tax rate is 6.2%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Aqualagoonian economy, worth 815 trillion Raindrops a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, highly specialized black market in Beef-Based Agriculture and Trout Farming. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 150,303 Raindrops, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Politicians accepting drinks in bars are executed for taking bribes, one does not simply walk into the tundra, 100-year-old politicians are now a thing of the past, and the new national mascot has to be wheeled onto the field of play. Crime, especially youth-related, is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Aqualagoon's national animal is the Trout, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Aqualagoon is ranked 165,527th in the world and 7,405th in the South Pacific for Largest Pizza Delivery Sector, scoring -15.36 on the Pepperoni Propulsion Productivity Index.

Largest Agricultural Sector: 1stLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 4thMost Ignorant Citizens: 50thHighest Crime Rates: 98thMost Armed: 108thMost Primitive: 129thMost Devout: 217thMost Rebellious Youth: 480thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 551stMost Subsidized Industry: 688thBest Weather: 1,011thNudest: 1,282ndMost Corrupt Governments: 1,394thTop
Most Avoided: 1,925thLargest Black Market: 3,266thHighest Disposable Incomes: 3,503rdFattest Citizens: 3,595thHighest Poor Incomes: 6,539thMost Efficient Economies: 7,247thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 7,698thTop
Most Beautiful Environments: 12,010thHighest Average Incomes: 12,747thRudest Citizens: 13,115thMost Stationary: 14,587thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 15,398th
Largest Agricultural Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 1st in the regionMost Primitive: 6th in the regionMost Armed: 7th in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 7th in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 7th in the regionMost Devout: 8th in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 17th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 19th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 24th in the regionMost Avoided: 28th in the regionNudest: 31st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 32nd in the regionBest Weather: 37th in the regionLargest Black Market: 57th in the regionTop
Highest Disposable Incomes: 77th in the regionFattest Citizens: 81st in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 147th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 180th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 280th in the regionMost Stationary: 292nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 322nd in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 323rd in the regionRudest Citizens: 347th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 367th in the regionTop
Largest Populations: 421st in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 448th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 748th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Aqualagoon was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Lowest Overall Tax Burden and the Top 10% for Highest Unexpected Death Rate.
  • : Following new legislation in Aqualagoon, the new national mascot has to be wheeled onto the field of play.
  • : Following new legislation in Aqualagoon, 100-year-old politicians are now a thing of the past.
  • : Following new legislation in Aqualagoon, one does not simply walk into the tundra.
  • : Following new legislation in Aqualagoon, politicians accepting drinks in bars are executed for taking bribes.
  • : Following new legislation in Aqualagoon, the nation's once beautiful countryside has turned brown as farmers spray potent pesticides.
  • : Following new legislation in Aqualagoon, awkward tourists are offered the 'unique experience' of rodeo clown.
  • : Following new legislation in Aqualagoon, the government is spending millions to provide full health care for all citizens.
  • : Following new legislation in Aqualagoon, pet loving officers arrest citizens who don't give their dogs enough biscuits.
  • : Following new legislation in Aqualagoon, one of the nation's leading exports is empty platitudes.


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