The Holy Empire of Apostolites is a titanic, efficient nation, ruled by Holy Emperor with an iron fist, and renowned for its public floggings, rampant corporate plagiarism, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 22.149 billion Apostolites are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Law & Order, Spirituality, and Administration also on the agenda, while Social Policy receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Megas Solomon. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Apostolitesian economy, worth an astonishing 15,117 trillion ichthys a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Information Technology, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 682,532 ichthys, with the richest citizens earning 6.2 times as much as the poorest.

A baby's first breath is also a baby's first felony, wigged-out hunters report playing croquet with the Queen of Hearts, neighbourhood gossips whip up controversy about those receiving adult merchandise, and police officers have nearly cracked a major underage astronomy syndicate. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Apostolites's national animal is the Eagle, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Holy Emperor's Word.

Apostolites is ranked 346^th in the world and 1^st in Holy Imperial Hegemony for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring 15,541.54 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.