The Most Serene Republic of Apellidor is a titanic, cultured nation, ruled by Andronikos the Castrator with an even hand, and renowned for its anti-smoking policies, unlimited-speed roads, and daily referendums. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 14.007 billion Apellidorans have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Apellidor-CRACTOAP. The average income tax rate is 97.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Apellidoran economy, worth a remarkable 3,258 trillion Apellidoran Thalers a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an amazing 232,668 Apellidoran Thalers, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Talkative students are escorted from schools in second-hand prison buses, horns and hypocrisy are the newest exports of Apellidor, conversion therapy coupons are a popular present for coming of age ceremonies, and five-year-olds chanting "Little Miss Muffet" are accused of bullying arachnophobes. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Apellidor's national animal is the Human, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is The Dectrip Faith.

Apellidor is ranked 2,789^th in the world and 1^st in Social Technocratic Union for Smartest Citizens, with 172.39 quips per hour.