Readies the fire extinguishers.
Why exactly are we supplying the future entrees with flamethrowers anyway?
Hm. I'd give it a seven outta ten. Well executed, but lacks that spark of originality.
Why? What's the worst that could happen? I mean, so California and Australia have had a few bonfires. They aren't here, are they?
Actually a Bass
is it safe now... I still feel... bad... oh well, gotta leave at some point...
a rope falls from the ceiling
Hello! It's your favorite person in the world... ...not. I was charged with giving out awards for the contest, and I will do the hated loved duty.
Third place goes to Alta Sil!
I promised to give them third place. Here it is. I'm gonna give you... this Justice League sticker book.
Will tell you 1st and 2nd soon. Like give it a few hours. BRB
goes back to the beams
In this case, there is still some work to do.
GIVE ME THIRD PLACE:
I submit this poem though it is Monday
For streams of fortune towards me do flow.
Competition and merit are so passť
In absence of others, my entries glow.
Third place is mine as I did pay
with an apology given quid pro quo.
GIVE ME FIRST PLACE:
First Place in sight, I shall belay
the trophy to my old Hyundai.
For hope is with me that no poems come
And displace these entries to my dismay.
GIVE ME SECOND PLACE:
I drive across to Second Place
And hug the title with warm embrace.
I stare with glee at trophies three
So Definitely Toby, this I tell thee:
In your future, bribes I foresee
If all the prizes belong to me.
pokes head out of a trap door on the floor, covered in dust and webs
You win... one pack of Green Lantern cards!
Yes, but mostly to sell the things they've stolen from our store room on the black market. Or ... that might just be me.
Wait. We already have three janitorial types loitering around the premises, which is more wait-staff than we have. Exactly how dirty does this place get in a day?
Agreed. We should get off our butts and unionize, stage a protest, or something. You two go plan it all, and wake me up when you've got it done.
Hush, Z. Let Miss Chief bus all the tables ze wants. We'll consider that a server-adjacent role.