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New Poll • Would you rather ?

Be gossiped about or never be talked about at all

Income of Rich: First: The Choir Boy top 0.07%. Second: Wailing Grannies top 2%. Third: Barman top 2% … Middle: Test Icicle bottom 44% … Last: Pencil Sharpeners bottom 0% last in the world)

Pabloh is notorious for its citizens' infidelity.

In Gay Parrot, counsellors have to sign pledges supporting gay rights before they can speak to any patients.

In Friends of Dorothy, the weather is the nation's most risqué topic of conversation.

Friends of Dorothy wrote:New Poll • Would you rather ?

Be gossiped about or never be talked about at all

Being gossiped about is inevitable. If you do nothing gossip-worthy, they'll gossip about that, or just make shyte up.


Awngthim wrote:85

Why 85 and not 86, my dear? Please explain.

Taxation: First: Yannia top 0.08%. Second: The Nude Beach top 0.2%. Third: Pabloh top 0.9% … Middle: Quesan top 15% … Last: Pencil Sharpeners bottom 0% (36th from bottom in world)

In Awngthim, public nudity is compulsory.

In Sharx, psychiatrists that date patients are congratulated on their romantic conquests.

In Iantopiia, there's no representation without taxation.

It is Friday, but whoa the horses my darlings, it is FRIDAY The 13TH.

Milk and honey protects against accidents and sudden death, so get to Tommy’s NOW !!!

Shall we have a funeral for our dearly departed friends Nelvana iii and Grave raven ??? Friday the 13th seems a good day for it. Feed them to the sharks or put them on a funeral pyre?

Oh no...not much going on in ND...
I wish I could log in as often as I used to. I will, soon. I hope. My life is in shambles right now, it´s always been easier to destroy than it is to build.
I´ll do my best to come back, and I will. Please don´t die out, great nations of Nudist Dreamland !

Great nations of Nudist Dreamland shouldn’t die out, but some do. Nelvana III and Grave Raven may come back if we have a funeral for them. That’s what often happens, a day after the funeral back they come to make everyone look foolish, but of course we’re over the moon to see them again, so funeral it is, tomorrow now, followed hopefully by a miraculous resurrection. Does that seem a good plan?

Fireworks now, wild dancing afterwards. Happy Friday night!

Intelligence: First: Yannia top 0.05%. Second: The Nude Beach top 0.4%. Third: Icarianna top 0.6% … Middle: Tubercular Sky top 14% … Last: Pencil Sharpeners bottom 0% (53rd from bottom in world)

In Big epic nation, it's usual for grandparents to stay in the family home with their descendants but younger children are often frightened of them.

In Jean Genet, burth rates have hit an all-time low.

In Dancing Dragons, bars are packed at all hours.


Nelvana III and Grave Raven

As you will remember, Nelvana III habitually joined Yannia at the top of the rankings for the fluffy, warm, progressive things in life, whilst Grave Raven, like The Choir Boy, kept a hard-working citizenry under stern control.

Pope Frankie addresses the gathered populace at Gay Parrot Square.

POPE FRANKIE In the beginning Gloria created the heaven and the earth. And the Fairy of Gloria trolled upon the eke of the aquas. And Gloria cackled, Let there be sparkle:

PEOPLE Let there be sparkle !!!

POPE FRANKIE And there was sparkle. And Gloria vardad the sparkle, that it was bona.

FRIENDS OF DOROTHY (aside) Good grief. Polari is for quaint 80 year olds reminiscing about their forbidden fruit, well shrivelled by now. Why can’t Pope Frankie just speak French-Canadian with a Scots accent like normal people? Anyway, the procession is underway. Will it turn right onto the Dunes where a funeral pyre is waiting, or continue straight on to the pier where Sir Nigel and Dame Brenda Shark are swimming in circular anticipation? Qu’est-ce que vous en pensez ?

Yannia, Nelvana iii, and San Francesco Bay

I say let Grave Raven fly with the flames, and let Nelvana III swim with the fishes!


The procession has made its way to the funeral pyre on the Dunes. A scattering of sleeping bodies from last night’s Wild Dancing litter the ground. They skedaddle when Pope Frankie casts a disapproving eye.

POPE FRANKIE Gloria vardad the sparkle, that it was bona.

PEOPLE You’ve done that bit.

POPE FRANKIE We are here to celebrate the life of Grave Raven.

WAILING GRANNIES Wail wail wail, boo hoo hoo; double, double toil and trouble;
fire burn and caldron bubble; wha wha wha..

The cheerleaders dance around the pyre holding the corpse of Grave Raven aloft. One two three .. They throw the body on the flaming pyre.

THE CHOIR BOYS Tumbling like the leaves
Yeah, we are spiraling on the breeze
Almost to the point of no return
Everything will burn, baby burn

PEOPLE Cheerio Grave Raven. You’re toast !!!

To be continued …

Yannia, Nelvana iii, and San Francesco Bay

The funeral will have to continue tomorrow unless someone wants to carry on. I’m watching Eurovision. x

That was a crispy burny send-off for Grave Raven. Fantabulosa !!! The mortal remains of Nelvana III are being watched over tonight by wailing grannies and cheerleaders. Let the whisky flow !

Poll result: Would you rather? ..
Never be talked about = 15 votes
Be gossiped about = 5 votes

Ukraine win Eurovision. Quelle surprise.

Moldova were robbed by the juries!

Pencil Sharpeners wrote:Moldova were robbed by the juries!

You’re right. Juries don’t know how to laugh and enjoy themselves. Moldova was pure entertainment.

Weather: First: The Nude Beach top 0.2%. Second: Icarianna top 0.4%. Third: Massimolandia top 0.8% … Middle: South west portis bottom 26% … Last: The Choir Boy bottom 0%

In PoorChoices, an increasing percentage of the population's youth have homosexual parents.

In Iantopiia, foreign policy often involves bullwhips and leather.

In Quesan, the government has pledged that not one drop of its citizens' blood will be spilt.

THE FUNERAL OF NELVANA III or Walking the Plank in Shark-infested Waters

The cold corpse has been cried over all night by wailing grannies, whilst cheerleaders cheer and turn cartwheels. The procession has now minced its way from the Dunes to the pier at Shark Harbour.
Grannies continue to wail, choir-children try to look serious and Gay Parrot marshals the solemn parade that weeps for Nelvana III. At the dockside, Pope Frankie drones on and on, but it's a funeral so people have to put up with it.

POPE FRANKIE Nelvana III will mince in newness of life, nishta anything shall separate him from the love of Gloria, which is in Crystal Josie, our Duchess.


POPE FRANKIE Oh for goodness sake, just say amen.

PEOPLE (chastened and obedient) Amen

CHOIR BOYS ♫ Be aware, what lies beneath
Razor sharp and pointy teeth
Walk the Plank!

Our dear, beloved Nelvana III is tipped into the briny deep and by noon today will be shark poo.

Cheerio, Nelvana, bye bye Grave Raven. Miss you !!! If you come back to us we’ll say the funeral was all a dream.

Crime: First: Pencil Sharpeners top 0.006% (15th in world). Second: Friends of Dorothy top 0.3%. Third: Gay Parrot top 0.7% … Middle: Big epic nation bottom 22% … Last: Yannia bottom 1%

In The Choir Boy, crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws.

In Barman, crime is moderate, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate.

In Jean Genet, crime is almost non-existent.

Friends of Dorothy wrote:Ukraine win Eurovision. Quelle surprise.

I thought the UK had a good chance, but we didn't manage to get the public support needed to overcome the popular vote for Ukraine. Anyway, I'm pleased that Eurovision has handed Ukraine a cultural victory.

Wealth Gaps: First: The Choir Boy top 0.008% (19th in world). Second: Pencil Sharpeners top 0.7%. Third: South west portis top 2% … Moddle: Quesan bottom 19% … Last: Tubercular Sky bottom 0%

In The Nude Beach, the government funds large training centres to turn dolphins into functioning members of society.

In Nudesia, political scientists despair as the national mascot election eclipses all others in voter enthusiasm.

In Gay Parrot, the nation leads Nudist Dreamland in per capita stalking.

Tuesday is Trivia Showdown Night at Tommy’s Bar

Here is your bonus question for a free milk and honey ..

Who won the Eurovision Song Contest on Saturday night?

a) Liverpool won on penalties

b) Emmanuel Macron

c) Ukraine

Will the Book of Answers have been updated quickly enough? Let’s hope so. Whisper your answer to Sal.

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