The Fattest Citizens in Kiribati
World Census takers tracked the sale of Cheetos and Twinkies to ascertain which nations most enjoyed the "kind bud."
 | Nation | WA Category | Motto | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1. |  The Queen's State of Lordre Bruin | Corporate Bordello | “The Powers That Be” | |
| 2. |  The District of Ribaberiki Kiribati | Anarchy | “Te Mauri, Te Raoi ao Te Tabomoa” | |
| 3. |  The Republic of Kyodome | Anarchy | “You Can't Stop Progress” | |
| 4. |  The Queen's State of Dolccirae | Free-Market Paradise | “Source” | |
| 5. |  The State of Charles Jeremiah | Compulsory Consumerist State | “Lines were made” | |
| 6. |  The State of The Violet Order | New York Times Democracy | “Preserving the order” | |
| 7. | The State of Metlakatla | Left-Leaning College State | “A Community by the Sea” | |
| 8. | The Queen's State of Alexander Kalichuk | Tyranny by Majority | “off” | |
| 9. |  The Arling of Kathil | Civil Rights Lovefest | “Udligon se Brōzagon” |