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«12. . .4,3544,3554,3564,3574,3584,3594,360. . .5,0515,052»

The Peanut Feast wrote:As the judge, only we cannot participate. Too bad. You will miss all of our wit and wisdom concerning Canadians…

I'm only interested if your wisdom involves the phrase "massive number of thermonuclear explosions."

The weekend poetry contest has started, eh! The Peanut Feast will be judging poems about Canada.

The Peanut Feast wrote:Okay, in honor of Ms Maple, the theme for this weekends poems will be: Canada. Extra credit for unique and humorous rhyme schemes!

Zombie Penguins wrote:The weekend poetry contest has started, eh! The Peanut Feast will be judging poems about Canada.

Presenting my entry for Third Place:

Canada.
Frozen hell.
Permafrost.
Brr, brr, brr!
Canada.

A vampire

Brocklandia wrote:Oh, don't be so self-righteous. First you pay your tab, then we give you your change.

"The mortal mentality will always surprise me. I come for a drink, to be insulted. Typical. But i still enjoy this place. "

He dropped a handful of coins and went to sit in a corner of the bar.

Lord protector of the land

Zombie Penguins wrote:The weekend poetry contest has started, eh! The Peanut Feast will be judging poems about Canada.

Big maple syrup
Very big maple syrup
Me big thirsty now

Brocklandia wrote:Presenting my entry for Third Place:

Canada.
Frozen hell.
Permafrost.
Brr, brr, brr!
Canada.

2nd place material right there
Also I'm a goddess now. Not a goddess inside a robot

O Canada!
Our home and native land!
True patriot love in all of us command.
With glowing hearts we see thee rise,
The True North strong and free!
From far and wide,
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.
God keep our land glorious and free!
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.

A vampire wrote:"The mortal mentality will always surprise me. I come for a drink, to be insulted. Typical. But i still enjoy this place. "

He dropped a handful of coins and went to sit in a corner of the bar.

Snuggles, you were the one who started with, and seem to be continuing, the insults. Rule Number One of the Bar is: Don't be a dick. So, in case you need it spelled out, don't be a dick.

Zany Zanes, Confederate cuba, and Sars cov-2

East lodge wrote:2nd place material right there
Also I'm a goddess now. Not a goddess inside a robot

Bah! Them's fightin' words! My poem deserves no better than Third Place, so stop trying to sway the judges. If you keep this up, I might have to give you a free dessert. Cheffy's apple pie a la mode is particularly ... aggressive tonight.

But congratulations on your promotion to goddess. Are you the patron of anything interesting? If you're the goddess of dust bunnies, your subjects are getting out of control, and you should do something about that.

Should I clarify that "do something" doesn't mean incite them to rise up in bloody rebellion against the rest of our customers? Nah ...

Zany Zanes and East lodge

Brocklandia wrote:Bah! Them's fightin' words! My poem deserves no better than Third Place, so stop trying to sway the judges. If you keep this up, I might have to give you a free dessert. Cheffy's apple pie a la mode is particularly ... aggressive tonight.

But congratulations on your promotion to goddess. Are you the patron of anything interesting? If you're the goddess of dust bunnies, your subjects are getting out of control, and you should do something about that.

Should I clarify that "do something" doesn't mean incite them to rise up in bloody rebellion against the rest of our customers? Nah ...

I've always been a goddess. I just lost my robot suit. Thanks a lot tho. I'm the goddess of cotton, candy, and nature, so I'm currently in very bad condition.

East lodge wrote:O Canada!
Our home and native land!
True patriot love in all of us command.
With glowing hearts we see thee rise,
The True North strong and free!
From far and wide,
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.
God keep our land glorious and free!
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.

Ka-Kanâtahk
Kîkinaw kitaskînaw
Sâkihitowin kicawâsimîsak
Kî-Mamichihawak mamichimawâk
Kichi kiwitinohk
Ôta ochî
Niti isko
Kâsîtoskâhtinan
Nôhtâwînân
Kânâwithita
Ka-Kanâtahk nitaskînân ôma
Ka-Kanâtahk nitaskînân tâpwê

Casomehano wrote:Ka-Kanâtahk
Kîkinaw kitaskînaw
Sâkihitowin kicawâsimîsak
Kî-Mamichihawak mamichimawâk
Kichi kiwitinohk
Ôta ochî
Niti isko
Kâsîtoskâhtinan
Nôhtâwînân
Kânâwithita
Ka-Kanâtahk nitaskînân ôma
Ka-Kanâtahk nitaskînân tâpwê

What language is that?

Casomehano wrote:Ka-Kanâtahk
Kîkinaw kitaskînaw
Sâkihitowin kicawâsimîsak
Kî-Mamichihawak mamichimawâk
Kichi kiwitinohk
Ôta ochî
Niti isko
Kâsîtoskâhtinan
Nôhtâwînân
Kânâwithita
Ka-Kanâtahk nitaskînân ôma
Ka-Kanâtahk nitaskînân tâpwê

Quack quack quack
Quack quackity quack
Qua-quack quack
Quackity quack quack

Is that culturally insensitive? Probably, to ducks.

Casomehano

East lodge wrote:What language is that?

Cree. I think.

Brocklandia wrote:Quack quack quack
Quack quackity quack
Qua-quack quack
Quackity quack quack

Is that culturally insensitive? Probably, to ducks.

Most likely.

Casomehano wrote:Cree. I think.

Most likely.

Yeah...

Ducks are so easily offended

East lodge wrote:I'm the goddess of cotton, candy, and nature, so I'm currently in very bad condition.

Okay, I'll ask the obvious. Nature and candy are obvious, but why does cotton need its own goddess? Or did you just take that gig because no one else wanted it? That's job security right there.

East lodge wrote:Yeah...
Ducks are so easily offended

And scary. There's a reason Cheffy doesn't use duck in any of the Bar's recipes, and that's 'cause Cheffy is afraid of ducks. Cthulhu? The Spaghetti Monster? Doesn't bat an eye. But ducks?--Just the sight of a duck reduces Cheffy to screaming for hours. Quack-quack, babies.

Zany Zanes and East lodge

Brocklandia wrote:There's a reason Cheffy doesn't use duck in any of the Bar's recipes, and that's 'cause Cheffy is afraid of ducks. Cthulhu? The Spaghetti Monster? Doesn't bat an eye. But ducks?--Just the sight of a duck reduces Cheffy to screaming for hours. Quack-quack, babies.

Maybe I shouldn’t have eaten those duck sausages for breakfast last week…

East lodge

Casomehano wrote:Maybe I shouldn’t have eaten those duck sausages for breakfast last week…

I'll defer to the ducks. But that would explain why they're forming an angry mob with torches and pitchforks out in the parking lot right this minute. What are your views on being tarred and (duck-)feathered?

I didn't even know pitchforks came in duck-sized versions. Well, live and learn, right?

Zombie Penguins, Zany Zanes, and East lodge

Brocklandia wrote:I'll defer to the ducks. But that would explain why they're forming an angry mob with torches and pitchforks out in the parking lot right this minute. What are your views on being tarred and (duck-)feathered?

I didn't even know pitchforks came in duck-sized versions. Well, live and learn, right?

Wait what?!? I’m gonna go hide!

Zany Zanes and East lodge

Brocklandia wrote:No, we sold it for scrap in last year's charity auction. Damned thing kept tick-tick-ticking nonstop. It was keeping us awake at night.

Damn, coulda used it.
Y’all have some gunpowder water or smthn?

A vampire wrote:Stay back, or I'll suck you dry.

No no. Be careful misser! Some people 'round 'ere may see that as a promise, rather than a threat... ;)

One of Cthulhu's tentacles beckons from one of the bathrooms.

Ok misser Cthulhu I coming!

Zany Zanes and East lodge

A vampire wrote:You underestimate my kind. Mortals will never change.

YOU OVERESTIMATE YOUR IMMORTALITY!
EVERYTHING FROM THE LOWLIEST THREAD IN THE FABRIC OF REALITY, THE INSUBSTANTIAL SUBATOMIC PARTICLES, AND THE SIMPLEST AMOEBAE UPTO STARS, GALAXIES, BLACK HOLES, THE UNIVERSE, REALITY, AND IMMORTAL SUPERNATURAL BEINGS HAVE AN END,... AND A DEATH.

PRAISE BE TO THE GREAT AZRAEL.

MORTALS BY THEIR VERY NATURE CHANGE,...
IMMORTALS CHANGE TOO - IT JUST TAKES LONGER.

Zany Zanes, East lodge, Sars cov-2, and The eostre hare

Brocklandia wrote:

And scary. There's a reason Cheffy doesn't use duck in any of the Bar's recipes, and that's 'cause Cheffy is afraid of ducks. Cthulhu? The Spaghetti Monster? Doesn't bat an eye. But ducks?--Just the sight of a duck reduces Cheffy to screaming for hours. Quack-quack, babies.

Oh hey...is that why we got these in the employee start up package?

Pulls out a chain attached to a small squishy yellow plastic duck wearing a top hat and gives it a squeeze producing a dismal squeak.

Mardatan wrote:

Y’all have some gunpowder water or smthn?

Puts away the rubber-ducky.

Uh...well, we definitely have something. Lots of something. Multiple types of something even.

AH ZANES! A KLATCHIAN COFFEE, IF YOU'LL SERVE!

Zany Zanes and Confederate cuba

Brocklandia wrote:...

For putting someone else's words in my mouth you're on the Naughty List...

...which means no change from the usual state of affairs.🎅🏻🤶🏻

Zombie Penguins, Zany Zanes, Confederate cuba, and The eostre hare

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