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«12. . .4,5954,5964,5974,5984,5994,6004,601. . .5,0515,052»

Puttin on the ritz wrote:A contest, you say?

Checks the transcripts.

Yep. I did say "contest". Feel free to join.

Rudolph flies around the room and takes a piece of paper with a poem on it from his bag

At home winter is always here but recently it's been ceasing

The pretty snow and ice poles are slowly decreasing

Reindeers don't like the warm; we like the cold

So we thank the machines up north trying to freeze the poles

It's not enough, but it'll do

Maybe we'll be okay if they continue to do what they do

And we treat the planet like it's new

With weakness and softness, not primordial and old

Maybe this year it will be cold

Do you have any hay?

Puttin on the ritz wrote:A contest, you say?

Tar slowly melting
Wheels start to stick
Vehicle starts to slow
Wheels become stuck
Winter freezes tar
Ice coated wheels
Vehicle fast approaching
Crash bang boom

Socianesia wrote:no no thanks i just want a tea

I recommend just bringing radiation pills. Alternatively, you can reinforce your stomach, or, if you're boring, detoxify your drink.

Armed forces of acara shura

CSharpa wrote:finishes off the armed forces by bombing them with a lotta carpets

Surely they can't get through that...

*Der Heimliche Aufmarsch but Slowed Intensifies*

YOU CANNOT STOP THE WORKERS! YOU CANNOT EXPLOIT THEM FOR ETERNITY WITHOUT ANSWERING FOR YOUR ACTIONS!

*500 Divisons just marchig and charging with Mosin's and MG's with Tanks and Helicopters*

Brocklandia wrote:But we can climb mountains if we're carrying any other kind of sign, right? Okay, everyone, prepare the burning bushes and the effigies of human genitalia! The mountain-climbing outing starts in fifteen minutes.

No. Don't. It is always dangerous to climb a mountain here. You can but you WILL get shot.

YouTube Inc, CSharpa, and Rudolph

Brocklandia wrote:But we can climb mountains if we're carrying any other kind of sign, right? Okay, everyone, prepare the burning bushes and the effigies of human genitalia! The mountain-climbing outing starts in fifteen minutes.

Rudolph: "Climbing!"

Hermey: "Human genit- no!"

rudolph stares intensly, as if hes not scared of his own death

Rudolph: "I want to burn some human genitilia!

Hermey leaves the bar
Hermey: "I'm using your card for the ride home."

Armed forces of acara shura wrote:

*500 Divisons just marchig and charging with Mosin's and MG's with Tanks and Helicopters*

Isn't the Mosin a little outdated?

The Georgeian Empire wrote:I recommend just bringing radiation pills. Alternatively, you can reinforce your stomach, or, if you're boring, detoxify your drink.

No no thanks

Socianesia wrote:No no thanks

Suit yourself.
Welp, I'm off.
I lift staff into the air and with a flash, it changes into a wrench with a spiralling antenna on the side. My body shakes for a moment, and then I disappear in a flash.

Rudolph

Rudolph

Rudolph burns a very suspicous bag

his nose lights up

The Georgeian Empire wrote:Suit yourself.
Welp, I'm off.
I lift staff into the air and with a flash, it changes into a wrench with a spiralling antenna on the side. My body shakes for a moment, and then I disappear in a flash.

the man who see it replies with

what in hell is wrong with this bar!?

*and run away*

Rudolph wrote:Rudolph: "I want to burn some human genitilia!
Hermey leaves the bar
Hermey: "I'm using your card for the ride home."

So ... does Rudolph pull the sleigh home after he goes on one of his drunken, human-genitalia-burning reindeer games?--Or do you get a designated sleigh-puller for the night?

Armed forces of acara shura wrote:YOU CANNOT STOP THE WORKERS! YOU CANNOT EXPLOIT THEM FOR ETERNITY WITHOUT ANSWERING FOR YOUR ACTIONS!

I dunno. It's worked for feudalism, capitalism, socialism, and communism ever since the 9th century. That's a pretty good run that shows no sign of stopping as long as workers insist on being paid wages.

Armed forces of acara shura wrote:No. Don't. It is always dangerous to climb a mountain here. You can but you WILL get shot.

Being shot sounds only slightly less invasive than working here. I say we flip a coin.

Socianesia wrote:what in hell is wrong with this bar!?

That depends on which sociological dissertation or which law enforcement agency you ask.

My favorite is the old standby: "They got kooties!"

The weekend poetry contest has ended. Zany Zanes shall declare a winner.

Rudolph

Brocklandia wrote:So ... does Rudolph pull the sleigh home after he goes on one of his drunken, human-genitalia-burning reindeer games?--Or do you get a designated sleigh-puller for the night?

Hermey gets an uber. The uber is grey

Rudolph will ask to be picked up because he's too drunk to fly home. The sled is at home. They came on the motorcycle

Rudolph saw the car and is colorblind probably

Brocklandia wrote:I dunno. It's worked for feudalism, capitalism, socialism, and communism ever since the 9th century. That's a pretty good run that shows no sign of stopping as long as workers insist on being paid wages.

*spits out tea your pretty sure wasn't there 2 seconds ago*

Workers get PaiD!??
I mean you work and you don't get paid.

hi

Drunkndisorderly and Rudolph

YouTube Inc wrote:Workers get PaiD!??
I mean you work and you don't get paid.

Well, not workers here, of course. But then, a bar run by an Ogre can hardly be considered a capitalist enterprise, no?

Rudolph wrote:Hermey gets an uber. The uber is grey
[...]
Rudolph saw the car and is colorblind probably

Yes, well, that's a carefully protected secret of the corporate world: All Ubers are gray.

YouTube Inc and Rudolph

Brocklandia wrote:Yes, well, that's a carefully protected secret of the corporate world: All Ubers are gray.

Rudolph watches 5 cars leave, and can't determine which is which. Rudolph drinks some... whatever he's... he's drinking gin. Very tired storyteller.

Emus Republic Of Australia wrote:hi

Hi, Welcome to The Bar.

Rudolph

Rudolph is drunk and can be seen taking all the napkins

Emus Republic Of Australia wrote:hi

Lo

I mean, no. No.

Polishes table.

Rudolph

Rudolph wrote:Rudolph watches 5 cars leave, and can't determine which is which. Rudolph drinks some... whatever he's... he's drinking gin. Very tired storyteller.

I'm surprised Rudolph hasn't thrown himself in front of all five of those cars. Must be waiting for a really big one, like Zombie Penguins' mega-SUV. I told TheOrc that putting that "Deer Crossing" sign in front of the Bar was a Very Bad Idea Indeed. But does ze ever listen to me?--Noooo.

Won't that be just what we need around here--a zombie reindeer.

Zombie Penguins and Rudolph

«12. . .4,5954,5964,5974,5984,5994,6004,601. . .5,0515,052»

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