The Finntopian Empire: An Overview

Razorbills are native.

In Finntopian Chess, you have to take the king to win (if the other person cannot make a move and they are in checkmate, the checkmater can take an extra move to take the king).

The national colour is the RGB value #B00B69, shown on our flag, and two penguins Mel (left) and Steve (right) military heroes used as weaponized assault penguins in our history (WAPs).

The national shape is a hexagon.

We do not have a Top-Level Domain, though FE was offered to us we rejected it out of principle.

The official national motto is written using the Finntopian writing system rather than being translated into Finntopian.

Days are ten hours, there are one hundred minutes in an hour and one hundred seconds in a minute. There are 100,000 seconds in a day. Clocks place the first hour at the top rather than immediately after it. We do not observe daylight saving time and use the equivalent of the Israel time zone.

We have 13 months, the extra one is the seventh and called Heisenmonth, which has 29 days (30 on a leap year) while the rest have 28.

Referees for every sport may wear any shoes they want.

NationStates policies section and world census data is non-canon.

Any mental health support (therapy, rehab, etc) is free.

Firelighters are called firestarters (translation) because of "that one song" according to the leader.

You get a sword when you graduate from third-level education.

Access to clean water is practically universal. The literacy rate is also around 100%.

All citizens are natives because we've never allowed slavery or immigration.

The national dish/flower is blackberries, it's tradition to make ice cream out of them when they start to appear.

We have Grandfather Frost (instead of Santa Claus) and call him Father Frost.

Classes are high quality, everyone gets the same sex education, and there is no mandatory homework or uniforms. We hardly use memorization work, with a focus on understanding subjects instead. Students are grouped primarily by ability rather than age. Placement is determined through testing and continuous assessment, allowing students to move up or down independently in different subjects within reasonable limits. School operates throughout the summer. Every student studies at least two of the following: English, chess, or a musical instrument.

We are known for our colourful buildings, similar to Russian ones, and Renaissance style architecture and interior decoration.

Pipes and cigars are more popular than cigarettes.

The average height is 5 foot 10 for men, and 5 foot 5 for women.

Education is practical but also covers general education, philosophy, history, cooking, mathematics, and other important skills. More specialised education is available for fields such as medicine.

Books, libraries, and preservation of knowledge are highly valued. Libraries are maintained by communities and contain both domestic and foreign works, allowing people to remain informed about history, science, philosophy, and world events.

TECHNOLOGY & COMMUNICATION

The Finntopian Empire avoids modern electronic technology. The internet, social media, computers, phones, televisions, tablets, and cameras are not used.

However, the country is not isolationist and information flows freely in non-digital form.

Knowledge from other countries is shared through books, printed materials, international correspondence, travellers, and carrier pigeons.

Scientific and medical knowledge from abroad is known and studied, but is adapted into small-scale production without industrial infrastructure.

Basic mechanical tools exist, including magnifying glasses and simple medical instruments, but there is no large-scale industrial manufacturing or electronics industry.

Electricity is not used.

Craftsmen produce goods individually using traditional methods rather than factory systems or workshops.

HEALTHCARE

Healthcare is free and community-driven. Modern medical knowledge is used, but medicine is produced through traditional methods rather than mass industrial production.

Antibiotics exist in locally produced form using small-scale, non-industrial processes based on imported medical knowledge.

Preventative treatments exist, including vaccine-like inoculations. These are not mandatory and are voluntarily chosen by citizens. They are not industrially standardised and vary slightly between communities.

Healthcare is delivered through community clinics staffed by trained medical workers.

SOCIETY & ECONOMY

Housing is guaranteed for all citizens, with communities ensuring everyone has a home according to need.

The Finntopian Empire has no money, taxation, wages, markets, or private ownership of productive property. Productive property is collectively owned, necessities are distributed according to need, and communities cooperate through voluntary labour and task rotation.

Private possessions and personal homes are respected, despite land and major property being collectively owned.

The most common forms of transport are horses, carts, bicycles, boats, and other low-technology methods.

Roads and infrastructure are maintained by communities working together.

There is no large-scale mechanised farming. Agriculture is handled through local farms and community-based production.

GOVERNMENT & CONSTITUTION

The Emperor serves as the constitutional guardian of the Empire, ensuring that the established system and constitution are upheld rather than governing day-to-day affairs.

The Empire is made up of communes, which are each led by a Chief and a Vice Chief.

Anyone meeting the constitutional requirements and willing to serve may be considered. Eligible candidates are first certified by the Emperor as meeting the constitutional requirements, after which the commune approves acceptable candidates. A random sortition then selects one approved candidate to serve as Chief and another to serve as Vice Chief.

Chiefs and Vice Chiefs serve two-year terms and may not serve consecutive terms.

Chiefs and communities have significant responsibility in governing their own areas. Chiefs primarily coordinate projects, mediate disputes, represent their commune, organise local defence, and communicate with the Emperor rather than acting as traditional rulers.

A commune may remove its Chief or Vice Chief before the end of their term through a recall referendum.

The Emperor is hereditary, but can be removed by appointed Chiefs if he attempts to fundamentally change the constitutional system. If there is no suitable heir, a Chief may be appointed to continue the hereditary line.

The Empire has a written constitution which defines basic law, economics, free speech, governance structure, and limits of authority, and also formally defines rights, responsibilities, and the structure of communal organisation. Constitutional amendments require the agreement of the Emperor and a substantial majority of the Chiefs.

Police are not a separate institution; law enforcement is carried out by community members assigned to the role.

LAW

Finntopian law is broadly based upon Robe-ist Christian moral teachings.

Unconsentual body modification eg circumcision, Ibubble bubble wrap (bubble wrap you can't pop with your fingers), giving alcohol to a moose or fish, child beauty pageants, and squatting are illegal.

No one is above the law.

Prostitution is legal, but organized prostitution (brothels) is not.

You are innocent until proven guilty.

There is no bail system.

Duelling (including to the death), saying anything at any volume, human sacrifice if the person consents, consensual adult cannibalism, consensual euthanasia, and driving with no seatbelt are legal.

People may lawfully use lethal force where reasonably necessary to prevent rape or an unlawful home invasion.

Weapons are generally legal, though more dangerous weapons require licensing, training, and a mental assessment. Traditional weapons such as bows, swords, spears, and similar weapons are common, while modern firearms and advanced weapons do not exist.

Transportation has no maximum speed limits.

Abortion is illegal.

The age of consent is 16 for everyone.

Rape and bestiality are punishable by death.

Vehicles such as horses and carts require licences when they are difficult to operate, though simpler forms of transport such as bicycles do not.

Driver licences may include individually assessed intoxication limits for alcohol and drugs. Drivers may legally operate only within the impairment level specified on their licence, while dangerous driving that endangers others remains illegal regardless of licence level.

Drug-selling licences may be obtained regardless of age, although professional training means they are almost always held by adults. Drug consumption is only legal from the age of 20.

Marriage is not recognized by law and is only performed symbolically.

Adoption requires two parents of opposite sexes.

Gender transition is permitted only from the age of 20 onward, but legal sex remains that assigned at birth.

We drive on the right-hand side of the road.

MILITARY

Defence is primarily handled by local communes and their militias.

Communities cooperate together on wider defensive matters and in times of major conflict.

The Finntopian Empire does not maintain a large standing military.

Penguins are the national animal and a symbol of the Empire's defensive forces.

LANGUAGE

We write top to bottom, switching to bottom to top every other line.

We use a base-12 numerical system with two new characters.

The language is not gendered.

We have a neutral singular pronoun.

Punctuation marks are at the start of a sentence.

We use additional punctuation marks including the interrobang, question comma, elrey, and love point.

The alphabetter: qwrtypzdfÞghʃjŋlvbnm.

We roll Rs.

The letter J is pronounced as it is in English.

If you directly translate Finntopian words, toes are feet fingers, Firelighters are firestarters (because of that one song), fishers are master baiters and Soccer/Football is Shoeball.

The letter W is pronounced "we" instead of "double u."

Capital letters are only used for names and for when a letter's name is said, e.g. cheese would be chEs.

We use Evidentiality.

We use Clusivity.

We use accusative alignment.

We don't have an extra word for brunette, our word for it directly translates to brown.

Our smell vocabulary is considerably more detailed than English, with many precise words describing different kinds of scents.

Our plural version of left and right means that it has an "on the" at the start. If this was in English for example, rights would mean on the right, and lefts would mean on the left.

We pronounce the letter "z" zee, not zed.

We often say "scratch the armpits of an earthworm" (English translation) to insult people.

To say we're going to the toilet it is common to say we're "playing chess with the pope" (English translation).

We use a mix of the imperial and metric systems, some of the measurements are millimetre, centimetre, inch, foot, decimetre, metre, mile, are, hectare, centilitre, decilitre, litre, dekalitre, hectolitre, kilolitre, acre, ounce, gram, pint, kilometre, gallon, stone, ton, centigram, decigram, hectogram, kilogram, and Fahrenheit.

Spelling is completely phonetic and follows the language's rules consistently without exceptions.

We use many compound words, similar to the Germans. We use them more often, and in our use, the elongated words are still rather short, as we have shorter words (as we don't use vowels).

Translated into English March is called Marchuary, April is Apruary, May is Jmay, and August is Jaugust.

FACTS ABOUT THE WORLD THE FINNTOPIAN EMPIRE EXISTS IN

The Patriot Act and similar laws don't exist worldwide (never invented).

More countries than The Finntopian Empire (Ireland namely) operate similar to our primitive style of government.

Candiru fish don't exist.

The DPRK's basketball rules are used (adopted worldwide when people realized their superiority).

Pluto is not considered a planet.

The world uses [url=[https://youtu.be/ePxrVU4M9uA]this](https://youtu.be/ePxrVU4M9uA]this) version[/url] of tic tac toe.

In 1798, the Finntopian Empire assisted Ireland during the Irish Rebellion after successfully repelling an earlier British invasion of the Empire. Ireland won the rebellion, united the entire island, gained territory from England, and retained its monarchy. Cork became the capital and grew into the country's principal city. Irish became the dominant national language and English ceased to be an official language. Irish nationalism consequently developed with a much stronger anti-British character than in our timeline.

HOLIDAYS

We don't have any months as celebrations, only days.

There is no Internet Safety Day. There are no days off that don't have a purpose.

We have an Ape Day on the 20th of April, emphasising gibbons.

There is Spoon Day on June 6th, where you only use spoons to eat (this is not legally binding).

We celebrate [url=[https://youtu.be/8kX62n6yNXA]Being](https://youtu.be/8kX62n6yNXA]Being) Alive Is Jolly Cool Day[/url].

RELIGION

We wear swimming clothes underneath waterproof robes to church, and is the official Robe-ist clothing.

It is considered a Christian denomination, but is quite different in practice.

According to Robe-ism, the Ultimate God made up a juicy, delicious gobstopper right in the middle of nothingness, then smashed it with a meat tenderizer, spilling the contents everywhere. This is often known as the Big Bang. This gobstopper was full of all the magic and energy of the universe.

Followers believe the chicken came first because eggs can't come.

Wednesday is our day of praying/going to church traditionally rather than Sunday. This is one reason we take Wednesday off work. Sunday is also commonly treated as a day of rest, although neither day off is legally mandatory for every citizen.

We have three Bibles, the Really Old Testament (modified Old Testament), the Still Pretty Old Testament (modified New Testament), and the New Testament (modified Francis of the Filth by George Miller).

Followers of Robe-ism are called Jesses.

We have a month of fasting similar to Ramadan, called Robe-adan, in November, where we follow 16-8 intermittent fasting and 4 days of no eating at all at any time in the month.

The religion is almost 100% believed in and practised in the country, but non-denominational Christianity is also common.

GEOGRAPHY

England, Northern Ireland, Brittany, and the British Antarctic Territory are part of Ireland.

Sakhalin is split between Japan and Russia.

River Gambia is all part of Gambia.

The Poland-Lithuanian Commonwealth, Chechoslovakia, Stanistan, Congo, Austria-Hungary, Sweden-Norway, Korea, Cyprus, Turkey and Greece (Rome), Yucatán Peninsula (Yucatan), and the Republic of C.U.M. (St Pierre and Miquelon, US, Canada, and Mexico) are all united.

Finland has pre-WW2 borders.

Russia reverted to a monarchy following the collapse of the Soviet Union.

The top part of Equatorial Guinea is part of Cameroon, and the bottom part is part of Gabon, which is called Grabon.

Pakistan and Bangladesh are part of India.

Israel/Palestine don't exist, as that is where The Finntopian Empire is geographically.

Guadeloupe (Karukera), Circassia, The Turks and Caicos, The Don Republic, Corsica, Wessex (Sussex), French Guiana (Amazonia), Newfoundland Island (Labrador), Both Virgin Islands (Virgin), Cayman, Pitcairn, Henderson, Ducie and Oeno, Saint Barthelemy, Sparti (Sparta), Scotland, Chechnya, Novgorod Republic, Réunion (Reunion), Saint Helena, Ascension and Tristan da Cunha, Mayotte, Cornwall, New Caledonia, Wallis And Futuna, Western Sahara (Sus), Tibet, Venice, Scotland, Alsace, Alderney, Isle of Man, Falkland, Occitania, Kuril, Tanna Tuva, Anguilla, Pandaya except for the Sri Lankan part (Muvendar), Bermuda, Kaliningrad Oblast (Prussian Teutonic Order), Neutral Moresnet, Niue, Hawaii, South Georgia and the South Sandwich Islands, Antigua, Barbuda, Åland, Wales, East Turkestan (Uyghur), Montserrat, Sardinia, Bora Bora, French Flanders, Faroe, British Indian Ocean Territory, and Ottowa are all independent.

The left part of Azerbaijan is part of Armenia.

Inner Mongolia is owned by Mongolia.

Iberia is united as Pain.

Latvia is called Flatvia and is a perfect rectangle.

Papua New Guinea is called Papua and owns the whole island.

Benin is called Dahomey.

Guinea-Bissau is called Bissau.

Sierra Leone is almost perfectly circular.

Eritrea is part of Ethiopia.

Crimea is part of Ukraine.

No Paraguay/Mississippi.

New Jersey does not exist.

California is split into two states, that split over party issues.

South Africa and Lesotho are swapped.

The Kingdom of Bugoslavia is a new country, similar to Yugoslavia with Albania and Bulgaria.

Burkina Faso is part of Niger.

Alaska is part of Liechtenstein.

French Polynesia is part of the Cook Islands.

Gibraltar is part of Spain.

Ceuta and Melilla are part of Morocco.

The Congo owns the detached part of Angola.

Guam and McDonald County are states.

The detached area of Michigan is part of Wisconsin.

Japan is called the Greater East Asia Co-Prosperity Sphere.

NATIONAL ANTHEM

The national anthem exists but has not yet been updated here.