The Federal Republic of United Subcarpathia is a huge, orderly nation, remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, frequent executions, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 965 million United Subcarpathians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Healthcare. The average income tax rate is 15.8%.

The thriving United Subcarpathian economy, worth 84.4 trillion PLNS a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Gambling, Uranium Mining, and Basket Weaving. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 87,487 PLNS, with the richest citizens earning 5.3 times as much as the poorest.

The government's fruit business reeks of rotting produce and corruption, teddy bears and pajamas have replaced briefcases and suits in United Subcarpathia's offices, hairdressers are among those who have disappeared overnight, and pharmaceutical companies emphatically promise that "your pills are in the mail" rather than admit any supply shortfall. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. United Subcarpathia's national animal is the Bear, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

United Subcarpathia is ranked 105,670^th in the world and 13^th in Poland for Healthiest Citizens, with 2.52 bananas ingested per day.