The Nifty Republic of Tzorsland is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Imperial Leader Lucifer with an even hand, and notable for its keen interest in outer space, pith helmet sales, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, humorless population of 43.438 billion Tzorslanders have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The minute, corrupt government, or what there is of one, prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Industry, and Education also on the agenda, while Social Policy and Welfare aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Eyesore. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Tzorslandian economy, worth an astonishing 18,371 trillion Tzors a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Retail, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is extensive. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 422,935 Tzors, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.2 times as much as the poorest.

Binoculars sales are at an all-time high, exports are stamped with "made by the invisible hand you commies", truncheon-mounted cameras record the beating of criminals in dynamic HD detail, and the blood, sweat, and tears of poor Tzorslanders make research institutes rich. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Tzorsland's national animal is the wild turkey, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is The Eye of Harmony Cult.

Tzorsland is ranked 61,184^th in the world and 3^rd in The Pleiades for Lowest Crime Rates, with 71.54 law-abiding acts per hour.