The Theocracy of Three Eyed Norwegian is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Great Lord Olaf with an iron fist, and renowned for its pith helmet sales, public floggings, and anti-smoking policies. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, devout population of 7.245 billion Three Eyed Norwegianians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Spirituality, with Defense, Law & Order, and Healthcare also on the agenda, while Welfare and International Aid aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Three Eyes. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 36.0%.

The strong Three Eyed Norwegianian economy, worth 383 trillion Eyes a year, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Cheese Exports, Gambling, and Pizza Delivery. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 52,973 Eyes, with the richest citizens earning 9.4 times as much as the poorest.

Street preachers spend more time condemning government bureaucracy than passers-by, discarded pennies litter the streets, Great Lord Olaf has just been declared ruler of Three Eyed Norwegian in an international press conference, and online weather reports are predicting five years of glorious sunshine for Three Eyed Norwegian. Crime, especially youth-related, is almost non-existent, thanks to a well-funded police force. Three Eyed Norwegian's national animal is the Loonie, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Three Eyed Norwegian is ranked 158,025^th in the world and 39^th in Mum for Lowest Crime Rates, with 60.33 law-abiding acts per hour.