The Dictatorship of Scarmonia is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by The Glorious Leader John with an iron fist, and notable for its frequent executions, aversion to nipples, and avowedly heterosexual populace. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 6.189 billion Scarmonians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Scar City. The average income tax rate is 69.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The Scarmonian economy, worth 333 trillion Scar Dollars a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Retail. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 53,834 Scar Dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.0 times as much as the poorest.

Tower block residents are each held responsible for four square inches of front lawn, the most popular stadium acts are one-off performances, citizens have an obligation to remain silent and anything they say may be used against them, and The Glorious Leader John is the self-declared God of all Scarmonia. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Scarmonia's national animal is the Phoenix, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Glorious-John-ism.

Scarmonia is ranked 73,313^th in the world and 947^th in the West Pacific for Lowest Crime Rates, with 69.57 law-abiding acts per hour.