Most Primitive: 560thMost Ignorant Citizens: 645thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1,216th
The Eternal Murmuration of
Iron Fist Consumerists
Ignorant bliss.
Civil Rights
Unheard Of
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Pain Suffering and Despair

Population4.169 billion


Currencylost soul
Animalpassenger pigeon

The Eternal Murmuration of Pain Suffering and Despair is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by REDACTED with an iron fist, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, public floggings, and frequent executions. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 4.169 billion Marthains are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Law & Order, Spirituality, and Administration are also considered important, while Welfare and International Aid are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Punishment. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 54.9%.

The frighteningly efficient in states of Pain Suffering and Despair economy, worth 563 trillion lost souls a year, is mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Uranium Mining, Gambling, Retail, and Furniture Restoration. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 135,118 lost souls, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 621,977 per year while the poor average 17,776, a ratio of 35.0 to 1.

It is illegal to carry an umbrella when the official weather forecast predicts a sunny day, children who can't memorize their multiplication tables are sent to the mines, soldiers' positions are given away by the glint of their bayonets, and customs officers pretend not to hear shouts of "HELP LET ME OUT!" emerging from diplomatic bags. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force. Pain Suffering and Despair's national animal is the passenger pigeon, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Martha.

Pain Suffering and Despair is ranked 37,472nd in the world and 3rd in Socialist American Necron Empire for Most Subsidized Industry, scoring 3,640.6 on the Gilded Widget Scale.

Most Primitive: 560thMost Ignorant Citizens: 645thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1,216thMost Devout: 1,672ndLargest Gambling Industry: 1,743rdLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1,793rdLargest Mining Sector: 1,805thFattest Citizens: 2,124thTop
Most Advanced Defense Forces: 2,731stNudest: 3,309thMost Avoided: 3,475thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 4,936thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 5,448thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 5,543rdLargest Black Market: 6,043rdMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 6,245thLargest Retail Industry: 6,707thMost Valuable International Artwork: 6,734thMost Corrupt Governments: 6,852ndMost Armed: 8,060thTop
Most Patriotic: 15,405thMost Conservative: 18,943rdHighest Average Incomes: 20,052ndMost Authoritarian: 23,629thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 25,009thMost Efficient Economies: 26,768th

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:


World Assembly

Endorsements Received: None.