The Gio of Nooooooooooooooo is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by John Edwards with an even hand, and notable for its rum-swilling pirates, state-planned economy, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 10.47 billion Noons are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, socially-minded morass — juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Salabrachon. The average income tax rate is 98.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Noon economy, worth a remarkable 1,428 trillion Angorejes a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is extremely specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 136,450 Angorejes, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Exceptionally healthy police officers can sprint after crooks for hours on end, the nation's police officers are famously miserable-looking, depression sinks in after each election when voters realize they are stuck with these people for years, and conspiracy theorists allege that the government is spying on them through their carbon monoxide detectors. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Nooooooooooooooo's national animal is the Foster, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Nooooooooooooooo is ranked 268,310^th in the world and 11^th in Karanlik Yollar for Largest Retail Industry, scoring -34.58 on the Shrinkwrap Consignment Productivity Index.