The Federation of New Welmarica is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Venerable Chairman Schmidt with an iron fist, and remarkable for its keen interest in outer space, complete lack of prisons, and ubiquitous missile silos. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 5.334 billion New Welmaricans are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Faywald City. The average income tax rate is 46.2%.

The frighteningly efficient New Welmarican economy, worth 870 trillion Welmarks a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Cheese Exports. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 163,187 Welmarks, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.8 times as much as the poorest.

Government officials are phoning up good-looking celebrities to say they want to breed with them, thrift shops are closing their doors, cash-strapped junkies lick rabbits for a cheap high, and the nation's laws on image rights are amongst the strictest in the world. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. New Welmarica's national animal is the Condor, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is State atheism.

New Welmarica is ranked 11,022^nd in the world and 21^st in The Alliance of Dictators for Healthiest Citizens, with 14.12 bananas ingested per day.