The Tough Old Crusty Professors of History of Eladen is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by The Eladeni Historical Society with an iron fist, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, zero percent divorce rate, and public floggings. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 17.018 billion Eladeni Historians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The enormous, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Vault of Knowledge. The average income tax rate is 97.8%.

The frighteningly efficient an Eladeni History Professor economy, worth a remarkable 2,585 trillion Silver Seers a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is led by the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing and Information Technology. Average income is an impressive 151,915 Silver Seers, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.3 times as much as the poorest.

School uniforms are compulsory, photographers can be found hiding behind the curtains in The Eladeni Historical Society's bedroom, consumption of cat memes has skyrocketed, and bris parties are all the rage. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. History of Eladen's national animal is the Termite, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is History of Eladen.

History of Eladen is ranked 240,219^th in the world and 27^th in Eladen for Largest Retail Industry, scoring -26.4 on the Shrinkwrap Consignment Productivity Index.