The Classy Realm of Half-Milers is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Warren Douglas with a fair hand, and remarkable for its rampant corporate plagiarism, keen interest in outer space, and complete lack of prisons. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic, cheerful population of 29.461 billion Half-Milersians hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The large, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Alexandria. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Half-Milersian economy, worth an astonishing 13,200 trillion Eleanors a year, is highly specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing and Information Technology. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 448,078 Eleanors, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Students abandon classrooms for online education, a suspicious number of male students have joined the Ladies' Wrestling League, every new building project has to undergo a five-year environmental impact study before it can go ahead, and national parks have long lines of different gender-specific 'Porta-Pottys'. Crime is totally unknown. Half-Milers's national animal is the Archie, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Half-Milers is ranked 15^th in the world and 2^nd in Wysteria for Most Popular Tourist Destinations, with 3,988.74 tourists per hour.