The Republic of Great United Columbia is a huge, genial nation, renowned for its daily referendums, ubiquitous missile silos, and irreverence towards religion. The compassionate, democratic population of 728 million Columbions have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The relatively small government prioritizes Law & Order, although Defense, Healthcare, and Welfare are also considered important, while Spirituality isn't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Vancouver. The average income tax rate is 18.5%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but inefficient Columbion economy, worth 41.6 trillion Columbions a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Door-to-door Insurance Sales industry, with major contributions from Woodchip Exports, Book Publishing, and Information Technology. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 57,105 Columbions, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

The navy is chrome-plating its battleships to prevent rust, a suspicious number of male students have joined the Ladies' Wrestling League, dog breeding has been banned in accordance with recent animal experimentation laws, and all mothers are allowed six months fully-paid maternity leave. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Great United Columbia's national animal is the Whale.

Great United Columbia is ranked 118,014^th in the world and 1,949^th in the South Pacific for Most Stationary, with 130.0575209298 days.