The Banner Hunting Big Thonkers of Golgothastan is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Bort Chocowitz with an iron fist, and renowned for its deadly medical pandemics, free-roaming dinosaurs, and infamous sell-swords. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, cheerful, devout population of 24.164 billion Golgothastanis are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The tiny, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Education, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Sæglópur. The average income tax rate is 6.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Golgothastani economy, worth a remarkable 3,096 trillion flugufrelsarinns a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Trout Farming and Retail. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 128,164 flugufrelsarinns, with the richest citizens earning 5.3 times as much as the poorest.

Sneezing pedestrians are grabbed by alley-lurking doctors, opposition party MPs campaign shirtless to show off their numerous lash scars, literature classes frequently go on field trips to rock concerts, and lip-readers are often left perplexed by political rallies. Crime, especially youth-related, is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, probably because of the absence of a police force. Golgothastan's national animal is the bat, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is thonking.

Golgothastan is ranked 10,859^th in the world and 477^th in Osiris for Most Efficient Economies, scoring 100.07 on the Krugman-Greenspan Business Outlook Index.