Population | 27.181 billion |
Capital | New Radiant |
Leader | His Holiness Alexander Ezlion VII |
Faith | Church of the Ezlion |
Currency | Fallow |
Animal | Kurtel |
The Holy Empire of Ezlion is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by His Holiness Alexander Ezlion VII with an iron fist, and renowned for its otherworldly petting zoo, infamous sell-swords, and parental licensing program. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 27.181 billion Ezlians are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.
The tiny, corrupt, moralistic, pro-business, well-organized government is effectively ruled by the Department of Defense, with Industry also on the agenda, while Environment and Welfare receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Radiant. Income tax is unheard of.
The frighteningly efficient Ezlionin economy, worth a remarkable 8,358 trillion Fallows a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Information Technology, and Gambling. Average income is an amazing 307,516 Fallows, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 2,692,782 per year while the poor average 5,303, a ratio of 507 to 1.
Scientific progress marches ever forward with the first ever launch of a cheeseburger into space, the government has to take out its Visa to eliminate visas, when flight control tells pilots to alter course the usual reply is "No, YOU move!", and citizens have to identify all the polar bears in a blizzard photo in order to access their bank account. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Ezlion's national animal is the Kurtel, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Church of the Ezlion.
Ezlion is ranked 10,501st in the world and 14th in The Land of Kings and Emperors for Most Stationary, with 2,292.53681749772 days.
National Happenings
Most Recent Government Activity:
- : Following new legislation in Ezlion, citizens have to identify all the polar bears in a blizzard photo in order to access their bank account.
- : Following new legislation in Ezlion, when flight control tells pilots to alter course the usual reply is "No, YOU move!".
- : Following new legislation in Ezlion, the government has to take out its Visa to eliminate visas.
- : Following new legislation in Ezlion, scientific progress marches ever forward with the first ever launch of a cheeseburger into space.
- : Following new legislation in Ezlion, nobility is the world's oldest profession.
- : Following new legislation in Ezlion, theories abound over why conspiracy theorists are being arrested.
- : Following new legislation in Ezlion, travelers often bring empty plastic bottles on Air Ezlion flights to avoid the pay lavatories.
- : Following new legislation in Ezlion, the government-sponsored autobiography 'A His Holiness Alexander Ezlion VII For All Seasons' has only been bought by the most loyal of His Holiness Alexander Ezlion VII's supporters.
- : Ezlion was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Influential.
- : Following new legislation in Ezlion, corporations have to consult a fifty-page "sanctions spreadsheet" to determine which countries they are allowed to do business with.