The State of Drift Wood Beach is a gargantuan, orderly nation, remarkable for its compulsory military service, anti-smoking policies, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-working, cynical population of 25.89 billion Drift Wood Beachians are rabid consumers, partly through choice and partly because the government tells them to and dissenters tend to vanish from their homes at night.

The medium-sized, pro-business, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Law & Order, although Education, Defense, and Environment are also considered important, while Welfare and Spirituality receive no funds. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 17.6%.

The thriving Drift Wood Beachian economy, worth a remarkable 1,160 trillion betales a year, is quite specialized and led by the Trout Farming industry, with significant contributions from Pizza Delivery, Retail, and Book Publishing. Average income is 44,835 betales, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 153,821 per year while the poor average 9,591, a ratio of 16.0 to 1.

The insurance industry is outlawed, school uniforms are compulsory, there's a shortage of swinging hot spots as land development grinds to a halt, and the police have reaffirmed their tough stance on drugs. Crime, especially youth-related, is almost non-existent, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. Drift Wood Beach's national animal is the deer, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Drift Wood Beach is ranked 158,118^th in the world and 1^st in Bamako for Lowest Crime Rates, with 60.32 law-abiding acts per hour.