The Card Colony of Deretanistan is a colossal, efficient nation, remarkable for its frequent executions, prohibition of alcohol, and hatred of cheese. The compassionate, cynical, devout population of 8.132 billion Deretanistanians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. The average income tax rate is 60.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The thriving Deretanistanian economy, worth 527 trillion banks a year, is led by the Uranium Mining industry, with major contributions from Basket Weaving, Woodchip Exports, and Retail. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 64,830 banks, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The roar of the Niagara 3000 mega-loo can be heard several blocks away, the new iVote app allows representatives to vote on legislation by launching ill-tempered birds and matching candies, travellers are often forcibly evicted by torch-bearing mobs, and Merry Birthday is a popular protest song despite the risk of fines and royalty dues. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Deretanistan's national animal is the dolphin, which can occasionally be seen avoiding garbage in the nation's murky oceans.

Deretanistan is ranked 55,930^th in the world and 2^nd in Komut Universe for Lowest Crime Rates, with 72.66 law-abiding acts per hour.