Population | 15.71 billion |
Currency | ham |
Animal | pig |
The Federation of Bionic Ham is a gargantuan, orderly nation, notable for its public floggings, strictly enforced bedtime, and restrictive gun laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 15.71 billion Bionic Hamians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."
The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Law & Order, and Education. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 70.3%.
The frighteningly efficient Bionic Hamian economy, worth a remarkable 3,077 trillion hams a year, is mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Retail, Soda Sales, Uranium Mining, and Gambling. Average income is an impressive 195,887 hams, with the richest citizens earning 6.7 times as much as the poorest.
The red star of communism has been replaced by the gold star of the McRonald's badge, politicians look weirdly alike, solving crossword puzzles requires fluency in at least five languages, and pausing for applause during a speech is seen as a form of censorship. Crime, especially youth-related, is almost non-existent, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Bionic Ham's national animal is the pig, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.
Bionic Ham is ranked 8,031st in the world and 62nd in 10000 Islands for Most Stationary, with 2,625.18771571212 days.
National Happenings
Most Recent Government Activity:
- : Following new legislation in Bionic Ham, pausing for applause during a speech is seen as a form of censorship.
- : Following new legislation in Bionic Ham, solving crossword puzzles requires fluency in at least five languages.
- : Bionic Ham was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Gambling Industry and the Top 5% for Highest Wealthy Incomes.
- : Following new legislation in Bionic Ham, politicians look weirdly alike.
- : Following new legislation in Bionic Ham, the red star of communism has been replaced by the gold star of the McRonald's badge.
- : Following new legislation in Bionic Ham, all writing must pass a censorship board before being allowed on the shelves.
- : Following new legislation in Bionic Ham, the "war on terror" doesn't seem to be making Bionic Hamians any less frightened.
- : Following new legislation in Bionic Ham, the lactose-intolerant are force-fed cheese products with predictably gassy results.
- : Following new legislation in Bionic Ham, politicians bribe ten-year-old geniuses to sit their aptitude tests.
- : Following new legislation in Bionic Ham, shanty towns of homeless immigrants are the ideal recruiting ground for terrorist organisations.